My List-Love

Love

Must Love me;

There is no right or wrong way to do this, everyone loves differently. I just want the security of knowing that you truly care for me and you cherish my strengths and accept my flaws. I have to not only hear you love me, I’m going to have to feel it.

my list love

Must Love Me

  • Must be able to Hug. You do not have to hug me every day. Do it when you want to. When you see I could use a hug. When I hug you, hug me back. Not asking for much.
  • Don’t say “I love you” unless you really mean it. Don’t say it simply because you love how I make you feel at the moment. If you love someone it goes beyond that moment and will get you though the moments that are not so perfect.
  • You have to allow yourself to really love someone. You can’t be afraid to love with all your heart, with no reservations, let it happen. I know that loving someone is not always simple, it’s hard and not everyone is able/capable of doing it. It means when they hurt, you hurt. When they are sad, it can bring you down. When they are in distress, you will feel helpless. Love may bring conflict in your life. Bottom line…you have to be able to allow a love like this in your life.

I honestly believe, some people just can’t do it, for what ever the reason my be, they just do all they can to keep from ever being hurt or feel any sort of distress. Well, love does that or it’s not love, it’s lust. Love hurts and not only when it ends.

Example:

You want to go fishing with your friends, been planning it for weeks, but that morning, the one you love is terribly ill. What do you do? You want to stay home and care for them, because you can relate to how nice it would be to have someone care for you when your not able to care for yourself. Without resentment, for becoming ill, (on the day you’re going fishing with your friends) you offer to stay home, because you want to. You do it because you love them.

The one you love will want you to go, because they love you and they can relate to how disappointed you must be feeling. They place blame upon themselves for becoming ill.

If you go, you will feel as though you should have insisted that you stay. Your beating yourself up inside, because your feeling selfish. You can’t truly enjoy your day, knowing the one you love needs you. This is normal when you love someone. If the one you love asks you to stay, they will feel guilty and selfish as well, for needing you when you wanted to be some place else.
There will be conflicts and sacrifices when you love someone. There is no way around it. It happens every day. It’s how we choose to handle these feelings that matters most of all. Some people just can’t handle it. They either do not know how or they are just not able to get past the negativity and see the positive.

What ever the outcome would be, you have to be able to be happy with your choice. You both have to be happy with the outcome. Get past the conflict, do what is best for both and communicate your true feelings to one another.

Family

  • Must love and respect my children. They are a part of me…..we are a package deal.

I love my children with all of my heart. I can never understand how a parent can not feel the same way about their children, as I do mine. Perhaps it is simply because they just can’t handle all the emotions that come out, when you allow yourself to truly love someone or something. It’s safer to shut those feelings out, than it is to embrace them.

  • So you must love your children with all your heart.

I’m not saying you have to be able to feel the exact same love I feel for my children, that’s really not possible. All I’m asking is, that you love your children enough to put their needs before your wants. To treat situations that occur with my children, as if it were your child(ren). If my child calls because they are broke down on the side of the road……You should want to offer to help, just as if it were your child that had called. I wouldn’t hesitate to offer my assistance. If you wouldn’t offer to help your own child(ren) then I doubt we would be together in the first place.

I know I am capable of loving someone else’s child / adult or otherwise, if for no other reason, because you love them and I love you. It’s just the way it works. Family is family and if we are together, we are family……100%, no fine lines.

It’s Not Easy

I love my cats. I love them very much. Sure, I know they will live for several years and then die. I know they will break my heart when they go. I know they can be a pain in the ass at times. Get in my face demanding attention when I’m trying to work. Leave litter scattered all over the floor. Let’s not forget the hairball they will leave for you to step on when they wake you and you jump out of bed to see what just happened, when they knocked over the vase of flowers. Cats have flaws, I’m okay with that, because I cherish how they make me feel when I don’t want to throw them outside. I love them, flaws and all.

Love isn’t easy. It will change you, because life is no longer all about you. You have become a couple. This means that you now have to think about someone else, as you make the choices, in your life. I can not just take off for a few days without consideration of the cats being cared for. I can’t just do as I please without considering how or if it will have any impact on my children. There is no I in Love, except when You say “I love you”.

If you think love is easy………..if you really love someone and they love you. Think again, read this article posted by The Huffington Post, if you think I don’t know what Love is. This is what real love is and I’m willing to Love, are you?

Power

Can you love someone? Will you let someone have the power to change your mood? If they love you, you have to remember, they will not intentionally try to change your moods to anything but for the good. So it’s okay to give them this power as long as they really love you.

You must be willing to Trust (next on my list) me completely, just as I will trust you. Trust me, that I only wish for you to be happy and only have your best interests at heart. I will trust you as well, unless you give me reason to doubt. If this happens, I will communicate my doubts and resolve them. I expect the same in return.

Love is give and receive, not give and take. It’s always been said, “love is give and take”. I don’t agree with this wording. You only take what has been given, so you are actually receiving. However you also need to take what is given, so I can see where it comes about. You should not have to take what has not been given. You shouldn’t steal a kiss, if you want a kiss. All you should do is initiate the desire and a kiss will be given, for you to take. If it isn’t offered, you will not be stealing a kiss. You will simply be placing your lips together.

 

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